The Beer Retard

Hard to believe Seattle Beer Week is only seven days away. There’s a definite excitement building in the Seattle beer community, from beer drinkers to brewers. I’m still in awe of how many events the Seattle Beer Collective has scheduled in just four months. These guys must be exhausted. At 5 pm next Thursday, all the hard work pays off when Pike’s Double IPA is tapped and 11 days of celebration begin.

If you can’t wait a week to try it, the Double IPA is already available in 22-ounce bombers at the Pike Pub and Bottleworks. I had a bomber last weekend and the beer tastes great. It’s hoppy as hell but not harshly bitter and drinks much more easily than you’d expect from such a big beer. According to Pike Head Brewer Drew Cluley and Assistant Head Brewer Dean Mochizuki, the second run of bottles tastes even better. It’s gone through another round of dry hopping, which has given the beer a more aromatic hop character. Also, the alcohol level has come down a bit, which means it’s probably even more drinkable. The draft version at the Opening Night Party at Pike on May 7th will be this newer batch.

Once festivities begin, I plan on documenting all the decadence and debauchery. I’d originally thought that only lack of sleep and/or liver damage would limit my attack, but now I have something else that could get in the way–I’ll be working at Bottleworks. It’s only part time, but I’m excited. I’ve been working on the Bottleworks blog and now I get to play a more active role. Should be a great experience.

Cavy addressing the adoring masses

By all accounts, Sunday’s Kegs for Cavy fundraiser at Brouwer’s was a resounding success and one hell of a party. Over $13,000 was raised through beer sales, silent auction items, donations and shaved heads. Yes, shaved heads. Skagit River Brewing’s Mike Armstrong brought the clippers and Brouwer’s Operations Manager Matt Bonney kicked in $20 for anyone who got their locks chopped off.

I was only there until around 10:30 (my lady overindulged for Cavy, tried to re-enact the puking scene from Team America and had to be shepherded home), so while I drank plenty, I missed out on Chris’s speech and his shearing. Luckily, photographic evidence was easy to find.

Cavy freshly shaved and getting love from the ladies

Cavy was blown away by the party and wanted to “extend my endless love and gratitude to everyone involved in any way, especially those in the beer community who donated kegs and time and made it happen. And an extra special thanks to my family at Brouwer’s, the most incredible bar in the world.”

If you didn’t make it out on Sunday, it’s not too late to contribute to Cavy’s recovery. Some of the kegs from Sunday are still pouring at Brouwer’s and there’s still a savings account in Cavy’s name at Frontier Bank. Just tell them you have a donation for Chris Cavanaugh and they’ll make sure the money gets to Cavy.

This Sunday (4/26), there’s a reason to drink beer that has nothing to do with avoiding the reality of Monday. This time we get shitfaced to help support a friend: Chris Cavanaugh, a manager/bartender at Brouwer’s, was recently diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Lymphoma (Leukemia). He’s already begun treatment and is taking six months off work to recuperate.

News of his illness shocked and saddened all of us. Friends and family are helping Chris through the physical and emotional challenges, and he also needs help with the finances. So on Sunday, Brouwer’s will be hosting Kegs For Cavy’s Cancer. Several local breweries (Big Time, Elysian, Hale’s, Baron, Schooner Exact, Naked City) and a few from further away (Left Hand, Avery, Victory) have donated 16 kegs, and every dollar from every pint will go directly to Cavy. In addition, there will be live music and a silent auction of cool stuff. The beers will be pouring all day, but things officially get started at 7 pm. The silent auction is at 8 pm and music starts at 9 pm.

I’ve known Cavy for about a year and I consider him a good friend. He’s one of the smartest and most interesting dudes you’ll meet. As a bartender, the man knows his beer and booze, but he also has a crapload of interests from all over the map that he’ll talk about intelligently and passionately. I visited him at the hospital during the first round of treatment, and I’m heartened by his positive attitude and energy. He’s determined to get through this and I know he will.

Please go to Brouwer’s on Sunday and have a few pints for Cavy. If you can’t make it but would like to make a contribution, contact Brouwer’s (206-267-2437). They’ve set up a savings account in Chris’s name at Frontier Bank in Fremont across from PCC. Or go to any Frontier Bank branch, give Cavy’s name, and make a deposit. You don’t need his account number or anything.

I saw Beer Wars on Thursday, and I’ve gotta say, it lived down to my low expectations. I doubted director Anat Baron’s ability to document the craft brewing world early on when she describes her background as working for Mike’s Hard Lemonade. I don’t know what that stuff is, but it isn’t beer.

The only person in the film from the craft brewing world who gets significant coverage is Sam Calagione of Dogfish Head. Baron focuses on him as an example of the little guy battling the big guys. Considering he’s spending $9 million dollars on a new brewing facility, it’s hard to consider him a little guy, but some of the Calagione stuff is interesting. There are also a few soundbites from Michael Jackson, Charlie Papazian, Stone’s Greg Koch and New Belgium’s Kim Jordan and a couple minutes of the Great American Beer Fest. Those parts were cool, but it would’ve been nice to see a more thorough overview of craft brewing.

The biggest flaw of the film is the focus on Rhonda Kallman and her Moonshot caffeine beer. Moonshot is a marketing gimmick, not a craft beer. It has absolutely nothing to do with craft beer. While the film portrays her as an underdog struggling to survive among the beer giants, I didn’t feel any sympathy for her, even when her kids are crying or her husband says they might lose everything if Moonshot fails. Before this, she was the number two person at Sam Adams, the biggest indie brewery in the country. She had a good thing going and she risked it for a gimmick like caffeine beer. Why the hell should we feel sorry for her?

A final complaint is the director’s Michael Moore act. She uses some of his gimmicks, like inserting herself into too many scenes, or shoving microphones in people’s faces and asking stupid questions. She also makes a lame Roger and Me attempt to get an interview with August Busch IV.

Can I say anything positive about the film? Well, I was wrong to think I wouldn’t learn anything from it. Baron does a pretty good job of detailing the ins and outs of the beer business. The section about the three-tier system is solid. Still, I think she could’ve dug a little deeper. For instance, how about breweries like Red Hook, Widmer and Goose Island signing distribution deals with Anheuser-Busch?

One other thing I liked was the archival footage and clips. Yeah, some of it looked crappy on the big screen compared with the slickness of the rest of the film, but it added a needed dose of humor and made the movie more entertaining.

Overall, the movie was a disappointment. It was worth seeing but could’ve been so much better. I didn’t stay for the panel discussion, so I can’t complain about that, but I heard from others that the misplaced moderator Ben Stein was out of his element. If you didn’t pay $15 to see it on the big screen, you’ll probably be able to watch the film on DVD soon. I’m thinking that’s what I should’ve done…

Yes, I’m going to see Beer Wars tonight. Am I excited about it? Not really…I’m trying to keep my expectations low so I’ll enjoy it more. After watching the trailer, I’m not sure I’ll learn anything from the film. But, you never know. I’ll do my best to keep an open mind. Look for some kind of review here tomorrow.

In a perfect world, I wouldn’t have to wake up at 6:30 tomorrow to go to work. In that world, I’d probably get on a bus to West Seattle after seeing Beer Wars.

Starting at 9pm, the Skylark is hosting a meet-the-brewer night with Jamie Floyd of Ninkasi Brewing. Up to six Ninkasi beers will be on tap including Total Domination, Tricerahops, Believer, Spring Reign and Oatis. There are also three local bands playing. There’s no cover charge for the music, so you can save all your scratch for beers. Damn…I wish I could go.

I’ve been accused of taking my anti-beer-douche crusade too far. I’ve also been called a hypocrite for bagging on beer snobbery while, at the same time, “putting craft beer on a pedestal.” So let me explain myself. You might be able to relate.

On the one hand, I like to drink good beer. I’ve drunk so much beer that I’ve become pretty picky about it. It pisses me off when a place that’s supposedly “all about beer” has dirty tap lines. I also like to eat quality food with my beer and I’m not against an upscale atmosphere as long as it isn’t too highbrow. I enjoy talking beer with truly passionate people who aren’t just name-dropping and broadcasting whatever status they think they’ve achieved with the contents of their beer cellar. Based on that description, it’d be hard for me to argue that I’m not a bit hoity when it comes to beer and the places where I drink it.

But… on the other hand, there’s also a part of me that loves hanging out in the skeeviest dive bars. I enjoy having cheap beer out of the can and random conversations with burnouts. I appreciate surly bartenders. I like places that have a feeling of unpredictability, and–dare I say–danger, to them. Overall, I feel like I ride the fence between the world of the beer douche and the dirtbag. As I get older, I’m afraid I may get softer and gravitate toward the beer douche side.

Luckily, Mike Seely has written a book called Seattle’s Best Dive Bars that should keep me honest. The great thing about the book is how Seely captures the atmosphere of every bar. He didn’t just pop in for one drink, take a few notes and write a couple witty paragraphs–you get the feeling he’s gotten shitfaced at a lot of these bars.

I’ve only been to 10-12 of the bars out of the dozens that are written up in the book. I plan on visiting them all. Whenever I find myself spending too much time rubbing shoulders with guys talking about their last trip to Cantillon or the amazing barleywines they’ve laid down in their cellars for vertical tastings, it’ll be time to pull out Seattle’s Best Dive Bars and find the closest place for a shot, a can of Rainier and $10 in pull tabs.

After one of my trademark two-week absences, it’s time to get back to it.

A slew of new beer spots are opening in these parts. There’s a new bottleshop called Seattle Beer Authority on Lake City Way (a grand opening celebration is planned for this weekend with sale prices and special tastings). In Redmond on the Eastside, Black Raven Brewing opened its taproom with its Trickster IPA and Batch 1 Brown Porter alongside eight Washington guest taps. Finally, Collins Pub owner Seth Howard opened his new joint, Hudson Public House, in the Maple Leaf neighborhood. I stopped by Hudson on Thursday for dinner and beers.

According to its sign, Hudson is a “New American Public House.” Not exactly sure what that means, but I’m glad the sign doesn’t say “Gastropub.” I hate that word. Makes me think I’m going to have gastrointestinal issues afterwards.

Anyway, Hudson has 16 taps, wine and a full liquor bar. The tap selection is solid–Pliny the Elder, Kwak, Cascade Mouton Rouge, Chuckanut Helles and New Belgium Biere de Mars–and the food is excellent. The menu ranges from burgers, salads and soups, to more adventurous stuff like lavender rabbit. I had the fish special of grilled halibut with sautéed ramps and mascarpone mashed potatoes that was a bargain at $13. Chef Erik Wood also told me he’s making a house-made veggie burger made with beets and kale, which is good news for vegetarians.

I liked the feel of Hudson Public. It’s modern and a little upscale, but still comfortable enough to settle in for several pints instead of throwing down one beer and bolting. If the crowd on Thursday is any indication, the neighborhood is pretty excited about the place. Even though I don’t live nearby, the good beer selection and affordable, quality eats will bring me back.

Sneak peek at the Double IPA label

On Monday, Pike Brewing head brewer Drew Cluley and the four members of the Seattle Beer Collective invited me to watch them brew a Double IPA that Pike will unveil on May 7th as the inaugural beer of Seattle Beer Week.

I could geek out and tell you what malts Cluley used or when he added the hops to the boil kettle. But, honestly, that stuff bores the hell out of me. Okay, I will tell you that he used five different hops: Amarillo, Centennial, Cascade, Columbus and Chinook. Happy now?

Seattle Beer Collective (l-r: Nat Pellman, Ian Roberts, Matt Younts, Mike Baker)

Anyway, it was a great way to spend a Monday morning. I saw what it’s like brewing on a big system, and I even got to dump some ingredients into the brewing kettle. Between steps, we enjoyed drinking and talking beer.

Pike Head Brewer Drew Cluley thinking about beer

Not to get all introspective, but it was a perfect example of what Seattle Beer Week is all about: having a good time celebrating local beer. I have a feeling the Pike Double IPA is going to be damn tasty and I’m glad I was there when it was created.

Seattle Beer Collective adding hops to the boil kettle